normal is relative

we think we know what normal is until we get completely out of normal and develop a new "normal."

it's the same normal, only different.

what we think we know, who we think we are, are only what they are as long as we think they are.

and as long as we know, it is nearly impossible to think any other way. to unlock a deeper "you", we must be open to believing that we don't know.

and even then, we must be pushed far beyond what we are to realize the ever deepening reality of our true self.

as we walk the path, our mind elevates

the more aware of ultimate reality we become, the more we see things for what they truly are. our actions become more deliberate and confident. we think about the consequence of our actions more, and think about whether we should or shouldn’t act, less.

we are better at understanding the present moment and become better at using all of the resources available to us, right now. while at the same time, we aren't stuck on what isn't. not hung up on the past, on what could have been, we see things for what they were and use the memory of the total experience to our advantage, in the present. 

we stop contemplating how things could have been different, or could be different. we accept everything for how it is. we effectively use our raw being, emotion & knowledge, to act in the present moment, to change the “future.”

no separation, no suffering.

i know this world is all delusion. and this is me playing within it.

life and death are but an illusion. yet still we live and die.

we should make the best of it and help others do the same.

love for the sake of loving. think to think.

laugh to laugh. hate to hate.

but understand there is no substance behind these things.

there is no separation between your hate & their laughter.

treat them as you want to treat yourself.

because you know them as an extension of yourself.

because their body & mind is your body & mind.

the only difference is your perspective that they are different.

with conscious mind we can change this.

and why wouldn't we,

if we could end all suffering?

the art of nature

this morning while sitting outside, a brisk rustling noise caught my attention. about a hundred yards away two squirrels were chasing each other around the trunk of a large tree. across the street, directly behind these guys were two blue birds, darting around yet another tree in a similar pattern. whether these animals were playing, or vying for territory i don't know. but something clicked in my head.

all i could see was the beauty in their dance. i saw the raw creative spirit of the universe playing with itself. i thought to myself, this is art.


art beyond words. art beyond thought.


all is, just as it is, for the sake of nothing & yet, everything. we too are this wonderful nature, and nature is everything.

nature is a holistic process. these animals didn't know why they were born, or how they had gotten to los angeles, or why they had run into this other animal with whom they were dancing - and it didn't matter. they were dancing all the same.

why then do so many people take this beauty for granted, or worse - take advantage without respecting it as an extension of themselves? because a vast majority of us are oblivious to this perspective. we do everything we can (unknowingly) to separate ourselves from nature (from which ironically, we are inevitably inseparable) for our own selfish reasons.

we see ourselves exclusively as this body, which is in this world - yet separate. perhaps we also see a soul within this body that is essentially and eternally "who we are" which can exist in some form without this body, after our body dies. and we see other people out there in the world who are, in this respect, the same as us. we watch as animals chase each other around. and we hear the wind dance through the trees. and we smell pine needles in the air and feel the sun on our skin. but as humans, it's very difficult to just exist with these sensations. we are cursed (and blessed) with the cognitive ability to take experience one step further. we can watch ourselves watch all of these things. it is this process that creates the illusion that there is a separation between us, and everything else.

we can think about thinking. this is an amazing gift, one that we struggle with every day of our lives. did we think the right thing? should we have thought a different way? did we act according to how we think we should think? we get caught up in this infinite loop.


maybe we aren't as smart as we think we are. or maybe, as smart as we don't think we are.


the good news? we can free ourselves from this mental trap. how? merely by recognizing it for what it is!

ok, to be honest, it really is that easy in principle...but much, much harder in practice. we must open our minds to a great degree. we must open our perspective to a point where our perspective is indistinguishable from that which we are perceiving. just as the squirrels are at one with their dance, we are one with ours. (zen practice can help you realize this way. for some it may come overnight. for others, many years. but it will come. you will see.)

as humans, because we have the conscious ability to debate our existence we have the tendancy to separate ourselves from nature - and just about everything that isn't "us", whatever that means to you. and while that is true to an extent, it isn't exclusive. we can be both "out there" in the world and "here" in our bodies, with no separation in between.

as our conscousnes expands, we see that we "are" more and more things we previously thought were just "out there." and as we realize we are these things, we soon realize that they are us. and while on the surface, it might sound as if these concepts were one in the same, they are certainly unique.

the realization that we are truly one with nature gradually deepens, until even the realization itself is realized, and disappears.



then suddenly. all that is left is nature itself.

what is instinct?

you know what it is. animals have it. trees have it. it's a way of acting without conscious thought. like a computer program. and once you realize who you are, you will clearly see that we are 100% instinct too. the only difference is, we've tricked ourselves into thinking we are “free” to make our own decisions. we think we act independently from the world around us. but it is impossible to remove ourselves from this universe. we are dependent on it and it is dependent on us.

the best meditation technique

every religion, sect, and group have their own recommendations on how to attain a clear mind, or how to attain enlightenment, or how to get or not get whatever. it can be confusing! who do we listen to? who’s “right”?

what is the best technique? i'll give you a hint: it doesn't fucking matter.

regardless of your meditation technique, whether it is shinkantaza, mindfulness, or something else altogether. they will all lead to realization, so long as you realize that whatever you do is merely a technique, and that eventually you are going to throw it away.

do not attach to the technique itself. one day you will not need it. always be aware of the fact that what you're doing begins and ends within itself.

you may think it is a means to and end, but it is not. if you find that hard to wrap your mind around, you're not alone. you only need the technique as long as you 'think' you need it.

one day it will click. and you will know when it does. and when you finally realize that you don't need the technique, you are free to continue to use it in a beautiful new way. a way that you never imagined possible. this is realization. this is what can't be taught - only hinted at. just keep going and you can see for yourself.

trust those that have gone before you. if you think the technique is helping, then allow it to help you, but have faith that this stage is very temporary. you don't have to rely on faith forever. eventually you will throw it away too.

the day will come when you will know what the ancestors knew. and you will be free.

a feeling beyond feeling

i've recently come upon this new experience.

the side effects are not unlike that feeling you get in your chest when you're deeply in love. but that feeling is not it. i'm not advanced enough in my practice to properly explain what i feel, but it's there. it's a feeling of whole-ness. this one-ness with all things that goes beyond being connected. it's full integration and it changes the way i deal with absolutely every aspect of my life. i want to share this feeling with everyone, but i don't know how.