treat the cause, not the symptom

if you're trying to not want the things that you want, or if you're trying to want the things that you think you should want, you're doing it wrong.

you may want to have sex with your friend's wife, but you don't want to want to have sex with your friends wife. or you may want to help those in need by donating time at a children's hospital or a nursing home, but you don't want it enough to actually do it.

A. in our delusional mind, it makes sense to fix our problems through one of the following options:
1. change ourselves, because we don't like who we are
2. remove ourselves from the situation, because we are ok and the situation is bad
3. change others, because they are wrong

these are two extreme examples of wanting to want, or wanting to not want. in both cases, you are fighting against yourself. think about this for a moment. how can one thing fight against itself? no singular thing can step outside of itself and manipulate itself, by force, into doing one thing or another. every "thing" in our reality can only change WITH its "environment."

what you begin to realize, is that there is no "thing" and no "environment." there is no "you" nor is there any world outside of you. there appears to be, but when you grasp the concept that neither can exist without relying on the other, this misconception of "you" as an individual begins to fade away.

as the concept of "you" as in your ego, begins to disappear, another option begins to emerge:

B. in our enlightened mind, we have come to the realization that while there is this "me" from which "i"  perceive the world, it is completely reliant on everything that isn't "me" and also the parts of "me" that i don't consider "myself." you can not separate yourself from this world. you can change the world and the world can change you, but it all happens in a way that transcends the division of you and the outside world. if you truly, deeply understand this. it is futile to think in terms of "you" and everything that isn't you. as this happens, so does your perspective. when your perspective shifts to a more universal position, when you begin to see yourself in everything, and everything in yourself, this idea that something must "change" fades away.

and this is where words hit "the wall." where understanding goes beyond words. words alone can not transfer the knowledge that is required at this point. keep studying and keep sitting.

try not to focus on the problems you have. you will need to throw away and go beyond this way of thinking, and as long as you have "problems" that you think need to be "fixed" you can not hope to achieve your goals.

don't mistake this with forgetting your problems, which would be avoidance. through time, your perspective on these problems will shift, revealing the true nature of reality.

practice and study, and the door will appear and open for you.

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